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Three Steps to Build Connection in a Job Interview, with Kacie Bail

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Many job seekers treat interviews as a series of questions to answer correctly, but doing so can make you blend in instead of stand out. On this episode of Find Your Dream Job, career coach Kacie Bail explains how to turn an interview into a genuine conversation that builds trust and connection with your interviewer. She shares three practical steps: listen intently, identify conversation threads, and engage naturally with what your interviewer says. By focusing on curiosity and connection, you can show that you’re not only qualified but also someone they’ll enjoy working with.

Kacie also offers simple ways to signal understanding, ask meaningful follow-up questions, and use nonverbal cues like nodding and smiling to build rapport. You’ll learn how to adapt these techniques for both casual and highly structured interviews — and why the goal isn’t perfection, but authenticity. As Kacie reminds us, interviewers may forget your exact answers, but they’ll always remember how you made them feel.

About Our Guest:

  • Kacie Bail is a career coach who helps introverts and non-native English speakers get more fulfilling jobs.  

Resources in This Episode:

Transcript

Find Your Dream Job, Episode 526:

Three Steps to Build Connection in a Job Interview, with Kacie Bail

Airdate: November 5, 2025

Mac Prichard:

This is Find Your Dream Job, the podcast that helps you get hired, have the career you want, and make a difference in life.

I’m your host, Mac Prichard. I’m also the founder of Mac’s List. It’s a job board in the Pacific Northwest that helps you find a fulfilling career.

Every Wednesday, I talk to a different expert about the tools you need to get the work you want.

Many candidates only answer questions in a job interview.

That’s a lost opportunity.

Because when you engage a hiring manager in conversation, you stand out from your competitors, make yourself memorable, and build trust and credibility.

Kacie Bail is here to talk about three steps to build connection in a job interview.

She’s a career coach who helps introverts and non-native English speakers get more fulfilling jobs.

Kacie joins us from Fairfax, Virginia.

We’re back in the Mac’s List studio. I’m talking with Kacie Bail.

She’s a career coach who helps introverts and non-native English speakers get more fulfilling jobs.

Kacie joins us from Fairfax, Virginia.

Now, Kacie, here’s where I want to start. Let’s start with connecting in a job interview. What do you mean exactly when you talk about connecting in a job interview?

Kacie Bail:

Sure, for me, connecting in a job interview is really knowing your experiences, skills, and values very well, and then finding a way to relate those things back to the role, the interviewer, or to the company.

And it’s also about how you interact with the interviewer in a way where they can feel understood. And there’s more of a comfort level and trust that starts to build where you can start seeing each other more as future colleagues.

And I do think that this connection piece is sometimes overlooked during an interview and I think that’s just in interviews sometimes people get nervous, and so when they’re only focused on delivering the best answers possible, sometimes we don’t realize that there are other opportunities that come up that can allow them to build deeper connections.

Mac Prichard:

Why do you think many candidates do focus on just providing an answer and that alone? What’s going on there?

Kacie Bail:

Yeah, so I think it’s surrounding the definition of an interview where you think that it’s just the interviewer asking you questions. So people spend a lot of time just focusing on trying to present themselves in the best way possible.

But I think we sometimes forget that there’s two people or more in an interview if it’s a panel interview. So it’s also about how you make your interviewers feel as well.

Mac Prichard:

You talked about making connections in a job interview. Why is it important to do this? How does this help you as a candidate when you build those connections?

Kacie Bail:

Sure. So I think this is really important because it can change the whole dynamic of the job interview. Instead of it feeling more like a one-way evaluation, it can start to feel more like a conversation.

And I think when this happens, the interviewer starts to feel more comfortable, and then they’re often more willing to share more information about the role, the company culture, or even more personal stories about themselves.

And I think that this can really help the candidate because it gives them more opportunities to connect their own experiences to what the interviewer is really looking for.

Mac Prichard:

What stops applicants from connecting in an interview? You talked about nervousness. You talked about the focus on answering the question. Are there other things happening as well, Kacie?

Kacie Bail:

Yeah, of course. I think there are a couple things that can stop an applicant from connecting. I think the first one is when the applicant doesn’t show curiosity about the hiring manager.

So you have to remember that the hiring manager is hoping that by hiring you, that you’ll be able to make their jobs easier in some way, or they’re hoping that you’ll be able to help them solve some challenges that they’re facing.

So by getting to know your interviewer and being able to show them how you can add value to the specific areas that they’re looking for, this is really important. I think another thing that can stop applicants from connecting is not asking the recruiter for who they’re going to be interviewing with beforehand.

So I think this is a mistake because it doesn’t give the candidate the opportunity to do some research on the interviewers beforehand to find areas to connect with.

And then also, I think not knowing your relevant work experience extremely well and how that aligns to the job description and the company culture can also stop a candidate from connecting.

And again, this goes back to how interviews can be very, very nerve-racking. So when you’re trying to remember things that happened from many years ago, or if you feel like you’re just winging it and you’re trying to make these connections in the moment, it can feel almost impossible to do that without adequate preparation.

Mac Prichard:

Well, let’s talk about preparation because there are four steps you recommend that people take to build connection in an interview, and it does require some planning before you walk into the interview room. The first one, I’m sorry, there are three steps. The first is that you listen intently. And when your interviewer is speaking, what do you have in mind here, Kacie?

Kacie Bail:

Sure, so for listening intently, all that means is to really pay close attention to what the interviewer is saying.

And this can be when the interviewer is introducing themselves, when they’re answering questions that you’ve prepared for them, or really any time that the interviewer is sharing more information about the role, the company, or even about themselves.

Also included in this is observing the body language and the tone of voice of your interviewer.

We do this because it can also impact how you connect with your interviewer later on. And I can go into that in more detail in steps two and three.

I think this is important because I think in general people do like to be listened to. And so when you’re listening intently, you also get another opportunity to pick out areas where you can start to control the direction of the conversation to find or to find something that can allow you to build more of a connection.

Mac Prichard:

And how do you do that? What does good listening or listening intently look like? What are you doing physically? And are you asking follow-up questions? What happens?

Kacie Bail:

Sure, sure. So as we get into steps two and three, when you’re listening, you’re also nodding along and showing some nonverbal behaviors. So I’ll get more into that in step three. And also just really observing the different word choices that they’re using, which also goes into our step two, which is identifying conversation threads.

Mac Prichard:

OK, so you’re listening intently. The second step is identifying conversation threads. What does that mean exactly? What are you doing when you’re identifying conversation threads?

Kacie Bail:

Sure. Let me take a step back and explain. A conversation thread is really just a topic that can open the door to a deeper discussion. So, to give you an example on that, let’s say that you are interviewing for a project manager position, and the interviewer says, in this role, you’re going to have to coordinate with four teams to deliver enhancements to our system. So you actually have three potential conversation topics that you can pull from that description.

And those are the four teams, the enhancements, and the system. And the reason why you want to identify these topics is because each one of these topics can give you the possibility to connect further with your interviewer.

Mac Prichard:

So you’ve identified those threads, what do you do next?

Kacie Bail:

Sure. So that’s when we get to step three, and that’s engaging with those conversation topics in some way. So all that means is you acknowledge or you interact with those conversation topics. And I’ll get more into that once we go over the four different ways that I recommend.

But I want to talk about why this step is so important. So this is really where you can start deepening that connection with your interviewer. And it’s probably one of the biggest missed opportunities that I see with my clients when we’re doing mock interviews.

And so what I mean by that is I see a lot of times clients come in and they have this list of questions that they want to ask the interviewer, which is great, right?

But it goes down something like this, where they have this list, they ask a question, they listen to the answer, and then they immediately move on to the next question without even acknowledging what the interviewer says.

So instead of doing that, I recommend that you engage with one of the one or more of the conversation topics that the interviewer mentions so that you can try to strengthen the connection with your interviewer.

Mac Prichard:

And how does that strengthen the connection? Because you’re a candidate. You’re in the room. You’ve made your list of five, eight, maybe 10 questions. You want to get through them all. Why will it benefit you as an applicant if you stop, listen, and react to what your interviewer is saying instead of moving on to your next question?

Kacie Bail:

Sure. So you’re trying to find different topics that you can connect on, right? So this is where your expertise, your research, and that listening can come into play. So, for example, if we take that project manager role description again, so if I’m applying for this project manager role, I would probably want to focus more on that four teams topic because I know as a project manager, I’ll have to interface more with these different teams as one of my main responsibilities.

So it’s kind of, it’s already showing some of your experience that way, based on the questions that you’re asking. It also allows you to leverage more of your research. So maybe you find out that your interviewer is a project manager as well.

And so you know that focusing more on the conversation topic of the four teams or the enhancements might be better choices to connect on than asking questions about the system.

Because if you ask about the system, there’s a possibility that could, that could be outside of their skillset because maybe the project manager isn’t as technical. So it allows you to find more topics where you can connect with the interviewer on.

Mac Prichard:

We’re going to take a break. When we come back, Kacie Bail will continue to share her advice on three steps you can take to build a connection in an interview.

In our second segment, we want to talk about ways to engage in conversation. So stay with us. We’ll be back after the break.

We’re back in the Mac’s List Studio. I’m talking with Kacie Bail. She’s a career coach who helps introverts and non-native English speakers get more fulfilling jobs.

And she joins us from Fairfax, Virginia.

Kacie, before the break, we talked about three steps you can take to build connection in a job interview. And central to this is having a conversation when you’re in the room. It’s not a legal deposition.

You’re not there just to answer questions. But you’re there to engage and listen and learn and contribute.

So some of us, for some of us rather, it can be challenging to engage in conversation, especially in a job interview. Let’s talk about your four tips for how to do this.

And the first one that you recommend is to signal understanding as well as share your own experiences. How do you recommend doing this, Kacie?

Kacie Bail:

Yeah, so in order to make a signal that you understand, I recommend making a short comment just to acknowledge that you understood the interviewer.

You can also just give a short opinion about something they said, for example, “That’s great,” or “That’s interesting.” And then, if applicable, you can then relate one of your own experiences back to one or more of the conversation topics that your interviewer mentions.

Mac Prichard:

Is there a way of doing this so that you don’t sound like you’re taking over the conversation?

Kacie Bail:

Yeah, so the key here is this should be short so if I can give you an example, going back to that project manager role description, so we had in this role, you’ll have to coordinate with four teams to deliver enhancements to our system.

So you can make a comment on the four teams conversation topic, and it would sound something like this. “Okay, that’s great. You know, I remember on my last project. I had to coordinate with numerous teams as well. So I’m glad to get the opportunity to do that in this role too.”

And so when you make a comment like this, it does several things. It shows that you’re listening. It shows that you are interested in what your interviewer is saying. It reinforces that you’ve done something like this before. And it’s showing the interviewer that this is the type of work that you want to do. So those are all great things.

Mac Prichard:

So tip number one is to make a comment. Your second tip for engaging your interviewer in conversation is to ask a follow-up question. What kind of follow-up questions do you recommend?

Kacie Bail:

Sure, so it might be more helpful if I give you some examples. So if we go back to that previous example with the project manager description, so a candidate could then engage with one or more of those conversation topics by asking a follow-up question.

So in that case, you could have three possible follow-up questions. For example, “Could you tell me more about the four teams that I’d be coordinating with” Or, “Would you mind expanding a little more on the enhancements I’d have to deliver?”

Or, “Could you provide more details on the system that I would use?” And so in this way, you’re picking and choosing which conversation topic that you’d like to ask a follow-up question on.

Mac Prichard:

And how do you make that choice? What is going to be most advantageous to you as an applicant when you consider what follow-up question to ask?

Kacie Bail:

So that’s when you need to take into account your own experiences, your own skill set, and also the research that you’ve done on your interviewer. So kind of going back to what I mentioned with the project manager skill set, you want to pick more topics that are related to your project manager experiences.

So in this case, that would be more about talking about your teams, maybe the enhancements, and maybe less on the system because you might get into too much of a technical conversation and that may not be in your skill set.

Mac Prichard:

The third of your four suggestions for engaging your interviewer in conversation is to paraphrase what you hear the interviewer saying. How do you do this, and why is it important to do it? I mean, how do you do it naturally, Kacie, so that you don’t sound like a parrot? And why is this going to help you as a candidate?

Kacie Bail:

Sure. So the way that you do that is, you know, paraphrasing is just restating in your own words what you heard the interviewer say to make sure that you understood them correctly. So if you don’t want to sound just like a parrot, maybe you don’t repeat back, you know, a whole paragraph of what you just heard the interviewer say.

Only pick the part where you really want a clarification and understanding. And to give you an example of that, so maybe they give you more details about the role, and they say, you throughout the day, I have to speak to three clients in India and Brazil.

You could go to them and paraphrase and say, just to make sure I understood you correctly, I will be the main point of contact for three clients on a daily basis.

And again, that just shows them that you’re really trying to understand them, that you’re trying to get the facts straight, that you’re serious about the role, and that can all make a really good impression on your interviewer.

Mac Prichard:

How do you choose which parts of the interview to paraphrase on? What are you trying to accomplish when you do this?

Kacie Bail:

Sure. So I would recommend using paraphrasing when you really want to clarify something. Okay. So that would be my main purpose for that.

Mac Prichard:

Okay. You talked about this before. Your fourth tip is for engaging your interviewers to use nonverbal behaviors such as nods or body language. What kind of body language matters?

Kacie Bail:

Sure. So I think in an interview, I would recommend having a more open body posture. So that means not crossing your arms. I think really concentrating on your facial expressions as well. So maybe occasionally smiling as you’re talking about something that you’re excited about.

And also, I think, like you said, nodding is also a really good nonverbal behavior to really show that you are listening and acknowledging what the interviewer is saying.

Mac Prichard:

Are there other body language cues that you find are important to keep in mind when you’re in the interview room?

Kacie Bail:

I think you can also keep into account, you know, also is the interviewer leaning in or are they leaning back? So if they’re leaning in, that usually can signal more that they are more interested in what you’re saying.

If they’re leaning back, it could mean that they’re a little bit more disengaged. So that might be a cue for you to maybe ask them a follow-up question on something they’re saying to try and explore different conversation topics that might interest them a little bit more.

Mac Prichard:

How can you tell that all these tips and steps you’re taking are actually working, that they’re helping you as a candidate in the interview room? What are the signs that things are going well for you as an applicant?

Kacie Bail:

Sure, so I think the sign that it’s going well is that the interview does start to feel more like a conversation. So if the interviewer is actually starting to speak more than you are, that’s usually a pretty good sign because it means they feel relaxed, they feel more comfortable to answer more of your questions and to give you more details.

Mac Prichard:

Some employers will follow a highly structured process for interviews. Every candidate, for example, get the same set of questions. And the panelists might simply ask the question and not engage in any banter or conversation, because that’s the way the process works.

This can happen in large organizations or in the public sector, for example. What advice do you have for somebody who finds themselves in that situation where it is a highly structured panel interview and very, very formal? How can you build connection and engage in conversation in that setting?

Kacie Bail:

Sure, so I think in that setting, I would still respect that it is a more formal process for them. So maybe in that case, you would not be engaging with the topics throughout the interview, and probably you would be waiting more towards the end. I will say even in these more formal interview settings, usually at the end, they will ask the candidate if they have any questions for them.

And so that’s your opportunity to ask them more questions, get to know them better. But then that’s when you can use those four different suggestions for engaging with the conversation topics.

You still, I would still recommend using the same suggestions for engaging, but maybe you might have to utilize those more towards the end of the interview to make sure that your interviewers are able to get all the questions out that they wanted to get out.

Mac Prichard:

It’s been a terrific conversation, Kacie. Now tell us what’s next for you.

Kacie Bail:

Sure, so I’ll continue to do one-on-one coaching. I also just launched a newsletter where I will give weekly career guidance. I also provide free coaching sessions via my Meetup. And for people who don’t feel ready for coaching, I also provide a free PDF on how to ace your behavioral interview from my website homepage.

Mac Prichard:

We’ll be sure to include links to your virtual meetup and other resources in the show notes. And I know that our audience can connect with you on LinkedIn.

And when you do reach out to Kacie, please mention you saw her on Find Your Dream Job. And that your website URL, Kacie, is KacieBail.com.

Now, given all the great advice you’ve shared today, what’s the one thing you want our audience to remember about your three steps to build connection?

Kacie Bail:

In a job interview, I want your audience to remember that this is a skill that you can learn through great preparation and practice. At the end of the day, interviewers may not remember all the answers that you give them, but they will remember how you made them feel.

Please remember to engage with what your interviewers say. This is a huge opportunity to connect with them during the interview, and it can make you more memorable.

Mac Prichard:

Next week, our guest will be Charity McDonald.

She’s an author, speaker, and career and leadership consultant.

It’s common now to change careers and you likely do so at least once and perhaps several times.

And to do it successfully, you need to know what works and what doesn’t work when you make the switch.

Join us next Wednesday when Charity McDonald and I talk about three paths for a career pivot.

Until next time, thanks for letting us help you find your dream job.

This show is produced by Mac’s List.

Until next time, thanks for letting us help you find your dream job.

This show is produced by Mac’s List.

Susan Thornton-Hough schedules our guests and writes our newsletter. Lisa Kislingbury Anderson manages our social media and creates our transcripts.

Our sound engineer and editor is Matt Fiorillo. And our music is by Freddy Trujillo.

This is Mac Prichard. See you next week.

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